Fracture

*

Take away my life,

be it false or real

it was real to me.

*

My carpet of security pulled from me without warning.

You have done this to me,

I will tell the world for all to see.

*

Rip from me your love,

a love I thought unloseable.

Take it and bestow it upon another.

I hope for your sake it doesn’t falter.

*

Empty my house of you,

your things will follow with scissor scars and dents,

bagged in bin bags – fit only for bins.

*

Be gone from my life so once more I can live,

Our children will survive, I will sure of that,

as cosy love-nest you are sat.

*

Be gone – yet not to far,

Take everything – but leave some,

Never darken my door – but keep your keys incase,

Your number erased from my phone – yet written in my book,

I’ve kept one photo – for a now and then look.

*

Author   R Gray x

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Lost Boy

*

I unfold his tight blanket wrap revealing tiny toes, small fingers with soft nail,

Eyes stare up at me, eyes of trust and wonder.

Steps one and two, first tooth nips my finger,

those days I wish, I wish would linger.

His floppy hair of gold, skin as fare as powdered snow,

eyes of piercing blue.

Beautiful does not near the word of his beauty,

a stumbling toddler yet a mighty King I see.

Unworthy I feel of his birth.

Years pass at quickened pace as slow we try those years to make.

With growth his shape it changes, cuddles decrease,

like a changing wind, my heart it stops as they completely cease.

Years of fifteen pass since the moment I wrapped him in my arms,

protection to my death, as death I would gladly welcome to guard my boy from harm.

*

His silence now, that glance of hate I no longer feel his warmth.

Yet life – the greatest teacher, we both will learn acceptance,

my boy will return to me, my arms are open, whenever that time may be.

Author – R Gray

Reasons to Lie

How often do you lie each day,

how often is the truth in every word you say.

To protect another’s feelings or illuminate a tale,

many days we try our best but sometimes we will fail. 

Think of that as I tell this fable,

try to understand the guilt – as close as you are able.

Now a little lie is white, and bigger known as dark,

but some are black as black can be,

no light of any brightness will be enough to see.

These are lies from early life that force a lot to flee.

As society creates the myth that all are born the same,

our futures mapped ahead – our riches there to claim.

As expected we get married, children born and raise,

fill our life with their beauty, cherish every phase.

But every day that blackened lie gets bigger in your mind,

and every day its fought away.

As a fragile ship on a heavy sea the waves will break you down,

you think that you are coping but you wear a heavy frown.

The question asked, the same reply – “I am fine of course my dear”

but the probing truth, its tighter grip fills your mind with fear.

As sleep is taken from you every single night,

and you work as hard as possible, try your best to make things right.

That battered ship is caving in, the sails are torn, its run aground,

but just before its sinking death, that love,

the one you thought would never be is well and truly found.

In his strong and tight embrace he takes away the harm,

 I lay upon his breast so comfortable and warm.

Call this love unnatural and many will agree,

but with open eyes and open heart,

a truer love upon this earth, you will never see.

Author – R Gray

 

 

 

One Year on

Its twelve months since my friend first showed me the WordPress site and helped set my account.
A year of many changes, if you do read my back catalogue of poems and story’s you may pick up on some different moods and changing times. This isn’t to say the years been a dark or bad one, on the contrary the year has been amazing, I have encountered people, places and situations I never dreamed of.

My working life began when I joined the Royal Navy in 1984, as a Navy diver I travelled the world  including a lengthy spell in Hong Kong but never really opened my eyes to all around, the people, the world, the culture. I suppose that’s a young thing, but disappointing never the less, although I did have a great time!

I’ve set a lot of things in motion to get to the place I have always dreamt to be, this following three years will develop to a new beginning, a beginning that will fruit to a life at slower pace, simple living, writing, music, home-grown produce and of course chickens for nice fresh eggs.

The countryside is where I’m destine.

Well happy new year to everyone, I hope alls well in your world. xx

“The End” Is also the beginning.

My head is down.

We chat with idle minds, of hope and new beginning.

Yet an end must first be done.

We speak words to fill gaps, coffee hot on our tired laps.

An end I say, a painful end. Your words ease me

your words help me see – help me see what you see.

“An end is but a change, a deflection in our journey

the beginning of a new – a new you.”

As a coral sponge absorbing a sea of knowledge I sit,

reflecting upon this profound statement, yet sense it makes,

from my own made darkness, my mind it takes.

As an end is due a beginning is anew.

“From a crystallized grub too flights beauty you say,

things will change, its natures way,

but change will sometimes hurt.”

*

Author – R Gray

Golfers Tussle

*

The bushes rumble and he appears,

A red-faced golfer in all the gear.

A slice – a hook I don’t much care 

what made his golf ball finish there.

My Hole I shout – three off the tee,

Cobblers to you, he returns to me.

On we go with fades and draws,

All within the rules and laws.

A bunker shot he’s got to hit,

Before too long the hamlet’s lit.

With trees and ponds along the way,

I find them all – Oh what a day.

We battle hard, we battle fare,

But most the way it stays all square.

We’re on the last, I’m one hole up,

I need to make this 10ft putt,

“ARGHH!” – 4ft by – he knocks his in,

I need this putt, I’ve got to win.

Away it rolls off towards the cup,

Around the lip, but it stays up.

*

I shake his hand acceptingly ,

THEN BEND ME PUTTER O’ER ME BLOODY KNEE.

Author – R Gray

A Kiss

A Kiss

*

I long, I’ve lived this moment in my mind.

Eyes fix to thy wanted, scent draws through me.

In this trance like state I melt to you, I die for you.

Nothing can waver this spell, passion destroys my control.

Hands of electric pulse lock together in light dancing harmony,

Tummy’s touch as close we press, no space between, distance put to bed.

Lingering stare holds me, suspends me in tiny time, our time.

Closer the lip moves to mine, tremble my body does, anticipation of you.

I take in your outward breath, sweet and moist it taste’s on my tongue.

As lips first touch, texture of velvet brushes mine.

I move over each lip, memorizing as if never to feel them again.

The press hardens to separate, turns to encapsulate,

Firm now is the press as my tongue sets free to dance a moist dark dance with yours.

Heart beats now many more times than before, mine punching my chest like a boxers fist. 

Hands draw each other towards the target of liquid state,

Our body’s to absorb one another, becoming one where we stand.

As one from that moment we are.

Author – R Gray